Commitment and Confusion

I was going to blog this afternoon about how everyone's too stressed about the test and how we should have some perspective. Relax, chill, don't panic, in the greater scheme of things it's not worth much, etc etc.

Then I wasted yet another afternoon on silly nonsense when I should have been working on that test.

And I thought about what Ruishan said, about how this is a dangerous way to think. And I figured, midsem's over, it's been months since I got outta the army, and it's time to stop the excuses and start picking up the slack.

So I made a commitment. To stop doing pointless stupid things. To focus a bit more on uni stuff. To at least start doing the bare minimum for tutorials and lectures. To stop expecting results to drop from the sky and start being active about working towards what I want.

Alright, so it's probably too late to salvage the torts test. But it's about time I woke up and got my game together.

So if you're my friend and you're reading this (I have NO IDEA why you'd be reading this unless you were my friend or at least know me), I need help. I need reminders that I've made this commitment. I need people to wake me up in lectures, to remind me that I should really focus on the lectures instead of my laptop, to remind me that I should do my tutorials, to remind me that readings have to be done.

Thank you. I deeply appreciate it.

...aaaand on top of that, I'm extremely confused now. I thought I had it worked out, but it turns out that it's all still messed up and weird. Why are people so hard to understand? And why do people never understand what you're trying to say?

I'm cool with having you as a friend, but I'm not sure if we can take it a step further. Or if there's even willingness on your part. Or if there's willingness on my part, too.

I need time to think, but time is of the essence too.

I need answers.